Solitary moments confined in surreal surroundings

A few more weeks have flown by, and here I am with less time in New Zealand left. After I had some luck with a fun circus fit class at the trust in Wellington, I fed some chooks and hung out a bit more with Jeremy, Chloe, and Mikey before I had to head out, and I got a ride from Sunshine to the Under the Spinfluence Festival. I also met Camille, who is French, and the three of us enjoyed a ride together. Once I arrived at the festival, I made it for he opening ceremonies, then I met up with Bianca. Got some food at the pot luck, hung out, and started to make some new friends. The dorms were cool, and quite warm. I enjoyed the performances, meeting new performers and instructors, and hanging out watching fire performers. Adagio and aerial workshops and play time were great, and hooping and meeting new people always fun. Coffee, food, chilly weather, and Saturday night running to town to get pizza with the Silver Circle Crew. It was such a fun few days, then I helped take the dome down, and we headed to South K, where Frenchie and Taz live, and there was a bit of a party. Silly times, Crewe Punch, and silliness. Shenanigans, indeed. I slept well, and Bee and I were off to catch a ferry next day. We got a ride from Picton into Nelson with Karl and Gary. I saw Karl's masks, and they were sooo awesome. Staying at Gary's was nice, and off we went in the AM to start hitching. We hitched up to Riverside, where we stayed with Damara and Che for a night. Kiwa was so sweet, and silks class was amazing fun. Also, getting lost with Bee around paddocks, and such, always fun. Yummy dinner was yummy, and good sleep. The next day we head to hang out with the cutest Twisty Twins and their beautiful pregnant bellies. So fantastic! Did some acro for a while with Tobias, and we were then off to start hitching towards Takaka. Golden Bay. Beautiful, but not when the weather is nasty. But, we did have some nice weather, and of course Dangerous Kitchen was awesome. Shaki's and the kids, and Avner- all so nice. Rock climbing in Paynes Ford was amazing. Made some friends, and I decided not to stick around there, but still, it was nice to see them again when we got a bit of a ride. Walking under the stars, and hearing the penguins at night. Bee and I had a last coffee together, hung out and said farewell. She started hitching to Christchurch, and after I mailed my package of stuff home, I started hitching towards the south. Hokitika being my first main destination. I had some interesting rides, and sure enough found myself in Westport. Stayed at a backpacker's called Bazil's, and had a great veggie burger and a good sleep. The next day, I walked out of town and found myselfa good hitching spot. I met my German friends at the next hitching spot in Charleston, and hung with them for a while. We finally all three got a ride to Punakaiki, and we hung out there and saw the Pancake Rocks. Spectacular. Next, I got a hitch, picked them up, and finished just a little past Barrytown. Then Angie, Doreen's daughter, picked me up and I came to Kapitea Ridge. So beautiful. The lambs, Alpacas, Bella and Nugget. Great accomodation and food. I have given some of my time, and been quite helpful. Today I stayed an extra day because I am fighting a bit of a cold. Not too bad, thanks to the zicam. I could have been on the mood, but one more day of rest was needed. I don't need to be full fledged sick heading down south. I can only hope the weather won't be too terrible. We will just have to see. Staying with Hannah at Fox Glacier, and then meeting up with Derrek this weekend. Should be cool! I hope. :D I need to make my plans for my final few days in Auckland, and see about flying out of Christchurch. So much to think about, and yet not too much. Enjoying this time to be on my own and understand more about myself. Enjoying the people of New Zealand, and wanting to reflect their kind nature in all that I do.

From Florida to Wellington- a week of introspection

It has been just over a week now since I embarked upon my solo journey to New Zealand. I can only remember now the thoughts that were racing through my brain as I was about to take my longest trip across land and sea. It is one thing to travel with other people, or to be meeting up with specific family or friends when you arrive in an unknown place. But, coming here I knew that I need to rely on my wits and the kindest of strangers, really. That can be overwhelming, especially for a quiet soul like myself, who mostly lives my days in and out lately only moving to an fro for work. I left Florida with tears in my eyes and uncertainties in my gut. Being an introvert means that I am to muster all the energy I have to engage socially and feel at ease in highly public places. A good set of headphones, my kindle, and of course the smartphone do help to keep me feeling like I have to constantly be into the outside world, but no one wants to seem completely closed off and shut in their own mind. Or do I? Once I left Atlanta, I did happen to sit next to (well, one seat away, as middle seat was vacant) a very nice, talkative man by the name of Carlos. He was more or less my age (guessing, I didn't ask), and we quickly learned that we had so much more in common than we would have ever known had the only words I would have spoken to him have been, "Oh, I believe you are in my seat..". I rarely strike conversation with seat partners on planes, but our conversations had some real merit. He was headed back home to LA to visit family, girlfriend, and to return with supplies. He was a stunt show director for a Pirate show at a resort in the Dominican Republic. So, of course we discuss staged combat, fight choreography, and possible people that move in the same circles, that we may know. After on and off conversations regarding Burning Man, and how we were probably flying over all those silly folk right then, fire props, and the possibility of adding mermaids to the show, I left the plane feeling like the 5 hours flew(haha literally) and also felt like I really made a friend. I possibly also scored some business for some friends of mine, but that I don't know. All in good time, I suppose. I stayed over night(well for about 4 1/2 hours) in a hotel near the LAX Airport. The area seemed a bit seedy, but all in all safe, and the shuttle system was quite easy. Worth it for a bed and hot shower. The next morning I prepared myself and got ready to catch my flight to Honolulu. That flight felt ever so much longer. But, flying into Hawaii during the day was BEAUTIFUL. Seeing the volcanoes, the turquoise waters, and you can almost sense the Tradewinds blowing on your face. It is a shame my stay was so short, and of course, not outdoors. But, I did take a look at the stirring weather outside. In the Honolulu airport, I met a couple of other Americans traveling to New Zealand. Never caught their names, but they both made me feel at ease. Their friendship reminded me of Heather Garry's and mine: two good friends who can share a good laugh, and almost read each other's minds. I felt that way with Heather when we were traveling together. I do miss her so dearly. After hanging in the airport for a bit, I took my power strip from the wall (yes, it did get used by others...people were VERY thankful), and I boarded the plane, to be on it for oh so long. (almost 9 hours). Turns out, the cool girls I met were sitting in the back of the plane with me. We all got our own row! It was pretty nice. I instantly felt better about the time of year that I chose to come to New Zealand. After a long, sleepy flight, I was so ready to be out of a plane and on the Earth for a good while. Getting to Auckland was a bit overwhelming, but mostly because there were a lot of people headed through customs. Once I got out of there, I grabbed the first taxi I could see, and was off to 143 Marua Road, to meet my first CS host. Upon arriving, I felt extra tired, and even more overwhelmed. I payed my expensive cab fare, and wandered up, in the rain. I do believe that I found the door, as the directions were spot on, and I knocked and rang the doorbell. No response. I knocked quite a bit louder, rang the bell a few more times, and once again, nobody. Feeling a little worried,I took a deep breath and maybe realized I went the wrong way. I went to the front of the building and buzzed another door, with 143 above it. Quickly a young man came out, and asked me what I needed. I said I was looking for Anna, and he had no idea who that was. But, he said he believes some girls live around the back, up the stairs, and when I said I was just there, he said, I was probably right. He helped me up, and was oh so nice. I thanked him and apologized, and began to knock again. Knock, knock. Ring, ring. To no avail, I figured that they are either sleeping or no one is home. Tired and frustrated with my situation, I noticed the covered porch, and decided to curl up for a bit, to warm up, it was rather rainy and cold out that night. I tried to get any such internet that I could, and had no luck. My phone was dying. And there was no where open. I knocked a few more times, and even tried to open the door, thinking maybe they left it unlocked. I noticed the fire staffs and had to know I was in the right place. Otherwise, some people are going to leave the door to find some bum just sleeping in the porch in the morning. But, as I was so tired, my tears consumed me, I got a blanket and Huey, my manatee out, and curled up on the floor, to try to sleep. Sleep was hard. My toes felt like icicles and kept going numb. At one point, I thought maybe they might be completely dead. I thought of every possible scenario. I thought of Jason, and how much I missed him, and how I would have sold my soul to be warm in his tent with him. Snuggled in his arms, wrapped tightly around me, and how I would whisper to him, "Please, never let me go. No matter how nomadic my heart is, please always keep me close by". I imagined myself getting hypothermia, or freezing to death, maybe pneumonia. Having the first few weeks of my trip be consumed by fever, coughing, and cold shivers. I imagined some serial killer on the loose, desiring fresh blood, and finding me there, ready to commit the deed. I imagined my host, warm in her bed inside, maybe completely unaware that I was there, because I had a timid knock. Because I did not want to be a bother, and so all I could do is suck it up. I thought that I had done this before, what wrong could really happen? Hours passed. I do believe I slept for about 2 or 3 hours, and morning was approaching. So, I gathered myself, left some stuff, and went to walk around. I had to find a phone..somewhere. I found a pay phone, but it was ripped off the cable. So I tried one gas station, and no luck. I tried a second one, and still no luck. So, the third place. It advertised coffee, which is always a good sign to me. And, it was open. So, I go in. I ask to use the phone, and he says that would be fine. But, then he says, "are you a backpacker, staying over here?" When I said yes, he knew exactly whom I was talking about and says this happens all of the time. He calls, and speaks with Anna, who then heads over. I purchased a cappuccino. It was the most delicious cappuccino I have ever had. I saw the sign that said, "Karma Cafe", and I really felt like my humbling experience had them come full circle. As I saw a beautiful, young woman approach me I already felt better. Meeting Anna was like another piece of heaven. I only wish I hadn't had the experience, because I did not want to make anyone feel badly. All in all, it worked out. Karma was on my side. And TheSpace was amazing! I slept in the loft, and had yummy food, delicious beer, and great moments. Mountain biking with Fu and Anna, and watching them climb, staff lessons and playing in the dance room with Amelia, Mags, and other friends, and Dr. Who. I found out that the doorbell was broken, and that I should have "banged" on the door. Meek Marla learned her lesson...but was given the best gift of meeting these beautiful souls. I was a bit sad to leave TheSpace so soon, but I did say I would be back. One day. If not, I will definitely hope to host them in Florida. I met Charlotte, who was heading south on that Sunday, so she offered to take me to Matamata. Sweet! She was good company, and I bought us breakfast pies as we cruised through the countryside. When she left me at the Horse and Jockey Inn, I knew I was alone again. But, a nice hotel would be just what I needed. It was quaint, and definitely not as fun, but it would work for my stay in Hobbiton. I left for my tour, and was so happy to be a part of that! Into the Shire I went, with hobbit holes, and lambs bounding around. It was a bit rainy and blustery, but the sun did end up shining. The Green Dragon was so nice, and I met some lovely European backpackers. A cider and warm fire made me feel all fuzzy inside, and off I was, back to town. Chinese take away, and the warmth of my room helped me to relax. I went to bed pretty early, as I had some planning to do the next day, and of course I was off on the next part of my adventure. I decided to get a phone from Vodaphone, and then I could talk to Jeremy. Having touched base with him, I caught my bus towards Wellington. I spent the day moving all through North Island south. I saw some of the most beautiful sights I have ever seen. Ice capped mountains, rolling hills, and desert colored clay. Glades, and Glens, and amazing inlets and rivers. The point of realization that you are lucky enough to see just how amazing this land is can be quite humbling. I remember feeling like I could stay on the bus forever! But, I arrived in Wellington, and hung out until Jeremey and Mikey came to pick me up. I felt at ease again in the company of perfect strangers. But, they were beautiful, and so nice. I came home where I met Chloe and Dido, the cat. I had some tea, and biscuits, and chatted with them. I learned that Chloe works for Youthline, which is an organization that helps distressed children and teenagers, working to keep them on the right track in life. Jeremey is a musician and teacher, and so is Mikey. In a lovely home of love, I was offered the music room to sleep in. I feel so fortunate to have stayed here, and no matter how cold it is, I feel the warmth from the type of people they are. I wish I could do so much more for them, but I made delicious vegan mac for them last night, and maybe tonight I can make something else. (or buy dinner?). Or purchase some tea for them. Downtown Wellington is great, I loved the Te Papa Museum. Feeling pretty inspired by the WoW exhibit of wearable art, and really excited about the giant Squid I saw. I purchased a cape also, which was quite nice, although a bit of a splurge. I do need to send some post cards, so maybe tomorrow I can do so. Write them tonight, and mail them from here, mayhaps. I am going to attempt to take a hand balancing class tonight at the Wellington Circus Trust, so looking forward to that. I thought about going to the CS meetup, but not so sure. I hope someone wants to help me out tomorrow, but if not, I should be fine. A backpacker hostel could work, potentially. At least that way would be a bit better than paying too much for a hotel. Although, with all of this roughing it in a way, a hotel shower could be rather nice. It has been really nice listening to the piano lessons that are happening in the other room. Such a cold day, and yet so much movement of my soul warming me up. Genuine human interactions have been quite nice, and I continually realize I have so much to work on within myself. Sustainable living, including having a garden, recycling better, composting properly, and using less energy is something I really do want to improve upon. We Americans take everything so for granted, and in general don't care about our carbon footprint on the Earth, but it is a huge one. Intentional communities created to help others learn about sustainable living together are what could help, and it is obvious that is happening in much of the world, including parts of the U.S. I don't know why I don't jump in on this more. I love my Moodhoops family, my blood family, and the people that I create life with, but there is so much more needed to be done. Artistically, ethically, earthly, and well, mindfully. I know this all probably sounds super generic, and out dated in terms of progressive thinking, but it is like I have been living in the dark at times. Well, time to get ready for hand balancing class. I should make my way towards the circus trust soon. Until next time!

Fresh Perspectives

Life is ever-changing. One of the biggest lessons I am learning is to listen to only my intuition and heart, and silence my over-analytical self. Changes that have come include taking a step back from planning my departure for South Korea to become an English teacher. Did I put hundreds of hours and dollars of work into getting there? Yes. Many, many emails, interviews, documents, scans, postage, etc. I finally received the right job offer to teach in Public schools through the EPIK program (and then all of the public school programs lol), but in a hard deliberation, I decided to pass on the opportunity for now. I am now in a state of complete re-evaluation, and it actually feels really good. Disappointed? Sure, I was, but why? This is my choice and my life. The bottom line is that I had a gut feeling that it wasn't the right choice for me. Even though I know I could do it, enjoy it somehow, and excel at teaching (let's face it, teaching is in my blood), but the calling just wasn't strong enough. So, I have decided to tame the wanderlust bug for just a little while to explore new opportunities with the emerging creative businesses I work for here, amongst people I love. I can also take the time to keep exploring my passions, and dive directly into where my heart strings are pulling me. Do I still have adventures ahead? Of course! Next month I am going to Philadelphia for the wedding of two of our dearest friends, and I will be a firey Phoenix performing aerial hula hoop dance at their reception. What's after that? Probably will save some pennies to head up to get my Transformus cherry popped in the mountains of North Carolina, and finally visit the beautiful Asheville, NC. After that? Off to Paris for a month to explore language through intensive French immersion classes and enjoy the city from a solo perspective. And then? Well, the ideas are brewing, but I can't spill them out of my little head quite yet. But do know, it shall be grand. :)

Turning the page to a new year.

Time has passed like autumn leaves fall, and winter snows melt. Well, winter is upon us, and here in Florida it is a whopping 53 degrees outside at 10 PM. It is snowing somewhere, however. It seems that 2013 has different adventures that lie ahead. I have been spending almost 6 months working on preparing myself to get a job as an ESL teacher in South Korea. What have I learned? That this is a highly tedious process which takes time and gumption in order to be successful. And well, although I have not had to pack my bags yet, I feel as though I am on top of it and setting myself up for the best possible experience. I have denied two contracts to private language schools, or hagwons, because I have been questioning if that would be the right kind of institution to dabble with teaching in. Franchises and companies based on education? Learning for profit, and not necessarily for the sake of learning? I have not completely ruled out hagwons, but public school is looking much better. Sure, I might not be offered as much as the hagwons offer, I will know my schedule, have more job security, and be in a better environment, I feel. I just wish I would have known this sooner, but once again, all in good time with this. In other thoughts, this has been taking a lot of my time and focus. But, I have so many other desirable things I want to do on my mind as well. Last weekend I performed at a wedding reception held at the Tampa Museum of Art. It went great, I was super pro, did my job, enjoyed it. Until they didn't hold up their end of the deal, and well, I left that night without payment. Needless to say, the person who hired me felt awful, and quickly sent payment with an additional tip, for which I am thoroughly grateful. I do love performing, and parts of me feel like I should not give up. And, well, I am not. But, let's face it, I have to know that time is limited, and not having as much time to perform might be something that happens. Well, I didn't want this to turn into a journal entry, but this is just a little glimpse into some of my constant thought processes about dealing with my artful self. It is hard to walk away from solely wanting to do it for everything in my life, for everything that I am. I will figure it all out soon, though. As time comes and goes, ideas make themselves apparent. And I grasp on to the ones worth holding on to.

Dancing across the land and sea

It has been long enough since I have updated this journal. This year has been filled with many journeys, both metaphorically and literally, and it has been a whirl wind of chaos, emotion, and understanding. Each adventure has lead to a new outcome, a new beginning, and life feels like it has grown to become something more intriguing than ever before. Here is a cliff's notes version of my travels as of recent, and some of the realizations I have come to have from all of the turn of events that have happened surrounding my excursions into the world. In early March I found a brave hair standing up on my arm, and decided to catch a flight up to NYC for an audition for the world-renowned dance company Pilobolus. Convinced by my beautifully artistic friends, I even had one, our own Ringmaster, Heffe, join me and audition as well. The weather in the city was cold and brutally honest. I confronted my fears, and moved as if no one was watching, and loved every minute of it. I taught the other girl in my audition group with a mo-hawk how to do a proper shoulder role. When she made the call back, she ran up to me and embraced me, saying she would never have made it if I wasn't there to help her. This was the best feeling, better than if I was the one who made the call back. While walking around the East Village in New York, I said to my friend, "If only Lucent Dossier was having auditions here, maybe I would be so lucky to make it with them." Well, I never made the Pilobolus audition, or auditioned for Lucent, but they ended up having auditions in NYC earlier this month, and now I believe have a resident New York show. :) Not long after I auditioned for Pilobolus, I learned about a group called Diavolo, who are based out of Las Angeles, California. I was convinced that I should continue on the audition path, trying out another contemporary dance audition, but this time something even a little more out there and tough. Diavolo is very extreme, acrobatic, and inventive. When I saw they were having a Dallas audition, I thought why not! Audition on Cinco de Mayo? Absolutely! So, I went off, this time alone, to Dallas, Texas for a few days to the audition. Having a rental car made life so much easier, and I fulled up and was ready for anything. When I arrived at the audition, I learned that there were only 16 of us. After an hour long discussion trying to convince us "not" to stay and audition, we all did. We danced, I tried. Let's face it, choreography is not my strong point. I poured my soul into it, and when the second song I danced to was one I have done an aerial performance to before, I really broke out of my confused shell ever so much more, but not quite enough. I certainly knew I was not going to make the cut, and even decided this time that I was little sad about it, and had a good sob in my car. I was exhausted, and I really was looking forward to showing my strength in acrobatic movement and body control. But, then I thought of what one of the girls told me when I was getting my bags at the end of the audition. She was one of the tall, beautiful, strong dancers. I looked up to her, even though I am sure she is at least 3 years my minor. She said, "I just have to tell you, your movement and energy is really inspirational to me. You have so much spirit." This is all I wanted to do. I showed my weakness, and to her it was a strength. I definitely did my usual post-audition food and retail therapy, and had yummy vegan food at Cosmic Cafe, and a shopping excursion to Buffalo Exchange, as well as a trip to the Aquarium. All in all a good journey. Fast forward to summer. One journey driving up north with my mom to Baltimore and then areas of Pennsylvania visiting family. A beautiful time spent with loved ones. Fast forward again when I flew back to Baltimore for my cousin Tiffani's Wedding in Perry County, PA. Another time full of memories, full of fond moments. I have a large family on my mother's side and it always feels like not much time has passed since I have seen any of my relatives, even if years have gone by. Enter October. One of my favorite months of the year. Pumpkin everything, cooler breezes becoming part of daily life, and beautiful natural lighting. For the second year we went to Alchemy-The Georgia Burn, in Lafayette, Georgia. Highlights of the weekend: frolicking with Miss Vix in our LED hoop skirts being fancy, like the "Cinderella's" of the burn. And of course wondrous time spent with amazing people. Laughing, cuddling, dancing, and enjoying simplicity. Shortly after Alchemy, I packed my bags to spend two weeks in Stuttgart, Germany. I knew it was time to visit my best friend, Breanna Conklin. With months of anticipation, two beautiful weeks came and went, and I couldn't be more appreciative for my time spent over there. Highlights were the Ludswigsburg Pumpkin Festival, hangouts with Michelle Young, Fritz Kern, and Jochen, and other fun people.Echo and Bailey. Of course the Wasen with Bree's dad, where we did stand up at the table and dance, even when I was jet lagged! Putting sticky houndstooth nails on, and staying up late telling our best stories about our flatulent times. Laughing and crying, and our girls trip to Paris. Everything about our trip to Paris! The TV tower, and Staatsgalerie museum, and everything about that day. Everything about the whole trip, it was beautiful. Germans are quiet, and pretty inviting. And Parisians, so friendly. Especially when you try your best to fit in with them and speak their language. ;) I ate like a queen for two weeks. And I learned a lot about what I want most in life. To love and be loved, and to look back only with a smile. So many more adventures to come, and I leave you now with this question: If you could be anywhere in the world in any time, where would you go, and when would you be there? Happy travels to all! Love and Light, Marla Mae

My belly is full of tofu fried rice

Dear Austin,

Oh, why must you have a Goodwill where everything I found fit me perfectly and is a reasonable price, yet still beyond my means of spending? I guess I just have to have fun trying things on and saying goodbye to them, until the money flows like a tree losing leaves. Or, at least until I can afford a $30/week budget for extras in my life.

Sincerely yours,

Marla Mae

P.S. I think we are headed to Barton Springs in a little while. By the ways, Flipside was an amazing time! Met so many interesting and talented people. Laughed, played on aerial rigs, and did acro yoga. Dressed up, ate good food, and volunteered. Pink Monkey is my Flipside name, as on my Shaven Apes shift I was in all pink, due to the fact that the yellow shirts could not be found. (Shaven Apes is Flipside's version of DPW). Anyhoo, good times had by all. I believe Jason and I are hitting the road en route to Colorado as of tomorrow, so if I do not update for a while, I will have lots to say in a few days!

All feet are the same! Toodles. <3

Ridin' on a bus...

I shall be on a bus for 12 hours. Fun. I think my pillow will be in my face 85 percent of the time.

Stacy Jane and I went and saw the Mississippi River last night after eating at The Green Goddess and having some frozen yogurt. The river is SOOO high. However, they are saying that it has crested, so New Orleans is safe. Bless all the people that are getting any flooding, however. I have them in my thoughts and prayers.

It is good to be going home for a week. I can work, help move in to the new house, and hopefully get over these allergies I have had for about a week. My head feels like a little balloon. :/

I will miss this city, but I will be honest that in the past two weeks I have learned that New Orleans is yet only a beautiful city for me to visit. It will always feel like a home away from home, when I need an urban atmosphere and some nice southern hospitality.

Time to go eat before boarding the bus. I wish I could get the pictures off of the only camera I have now, which is my phone, but I can't. :( But, I shall remedy this soon.

Love and Light to all,

Marla Mae